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The Good Stuff
Udder Tell the Time
by B. A. Llewellyn
Length: 174 words 

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Udder Tell the Time

Richard Whiteley is a well known personality on English television.  He tells this delightful anecdote about an interview he conducted, when he was a young TV reporter, with a farmer on the wilder uplands of Wensleydale. 

"After the interview, about the hardships of hill farming, I was conscious of the time and of having to get the film crew off for their lunch.

Not having a watch that day for some reason, I asked the farmer for the time.

"Aye, lad," he said.  "Ah'll tell thee."  He crouched down beside the cow in the farmyard and, with his great Yorkshire horny hand, strengthened and pitted with years of toil, lifted the cow's udder ever so gently.  "Ten to one," was the reply.

The film crew and I were amazed.

"How can you tell the time by feeling a cow's udder?" I marvelled.

"Come here, lad, ah'll show thee." 

Stooping down again, he said, "If you crouch down like this and lift up the udder, you can just see the church clock across the valley."

 The Udder of a Huge Concrete Cow Frames a Passing Red Sportscar
The Udder of a Huge Concrete Cow Frames a Passing Red Sportscar Photographic Print
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